PTSD / disability: What you don’t see

All social media usually shows is the rosy side of life. I do try to post about the whole picture around living with a medical fuck up acquired disability. But there are always things you don’t see when you read about the rosier side of life.

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Winter duathlon round 2

❣️Feeling mighty chuffed with todays duathlon.❣️

Thank yous

🙏🏻 Thank you to Southland Triathlon and Multisport Club for being super accommodating & allowing me to use the 👩🏼‍🦽🚴🏼‍♀️👩🏼‍🦽 for todays race. This is not a format that’s usually allowed because according to the sports classifiers because my right leg is ok (even though it isn’t, the lymphedema and TKR aren’t taken into account) they expect me to be able to run 5KM (I can’t even walk that far without mobility aids). So under official triathlon rules I’m not allowed to use a wheelchair. Incidentally they also don’t take into account the vascular limitations I still have in my left leg when classifying me. Very frustrating.
🙏🏻 Thank you to Peter for giving up his Sunday lie in to come and freeze his ass off / be my handler 🤩


🔥 According to Strava I set a new wheelchair 1 mile PB – this is the first time I have been faster in the sports chair than my regular chair. It’s also the first outing in it since the new side guards have been made (to protect my forearms and trousers)
🔥 Using a wheelchair allowed me to stay a lot closer to the back of the running pack than I usually would be on two legs
🔥 Much much better transitions – 1:30 and 1:00 with only a bike leg to put on/ take off. Able to get rid of the crutches, run/ walk leg and the seat out of transition. Kept the wheelchair gloves and helmet on throughout.

❣️Last month I did 1km-5KM-1km.
❣️Today I did 1.5KM-10km-1.5KM. I was only 3 mins slower than last month despite the distances being almost double.

Something I learned..

🤔 Something I learned: I can’t strap my foot into my sports wheelchair with my bike shoe on – sadly.. cleat gets in the way! And.. if I go shoeless on the wheelchair my foot/ sock gets wet and cold 🤪🤣 I think I need to use a waterproof bike sock next time!


It was mighty tough work for me and took a lot more energy from me than I expected. I’ve been pretty tired the rest of the day, both arms and legs!


I have to remember that I expend a lot more energy (4 x at least apparently) just by being an amputee.

So the fact that I was only just off the back of the pack the first run against a field of able bodied people when I was only using my arms makes me very happy indeed. (Average speed 6:18/km) And.. by the time I got to the second run I had runners behind me 🤩

My transitions were a lot lot better. It’s all a case of practice, muddle through and figure out what works best though a process of elimination!

It’s only a small local thing but that race buzz I used to have – there was a smidgen of that returning today when I – for the first time – wasn’t dead last and was actually mixing it up in the middle of the field (of 2 legged people!)

I hate the clickiness of the local Tri scene. I hate that I’m the only para almost all of the time.. but I’m starting to become ok with that. And others are recognising me from other places (like Parkrun) and that’s the reason they might talk to me now instead of the disability novelty factor. ❤️

Wensley’s Cycles winter duathlon series Race 1: race report

The last few weeks have been a roller coaster at best. The PTSD has been off the charts meaning the slightest little thing has been knocking me off that precipice.

Remember this visual analogy?

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New walk/ run goal – day 1

There’s been a million reasons why my blade running has stalled. Some of those are out of my control, and some are barriers I have created for myself. Todays the day I actually start doing something about that.

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