What’s the hardest decision you’ve ever had to make? Why?
Straight away you may think that choosing to have my leg amputated would be the most difficult decision of my life, but no. Choosing amputation was one of the easiest decisions I have ever made. It was, quite simply, a no brainer.
Perhaps choosing to let my ex-husband go when he declared 24 hours after my amputation news that the marriage was over. Nope, that was also an easy decision. The things I have since learned about personality types just confirms that all the more.
The decision that is giving me the most stress and sadness, is the one where I decide (or not) that Triathlon is no longer something I can do.
I am not yet ready to give up on that goal, however, it is proving to be incredibly challenging indeed.
I have had to restructure my life entirely. Exercise was my happy place, my go-to when I was down, bored, upset or angry. It can no longer be any of those things to me, and THAT.. is a difficult thing to accept.
Alternative go-to’s
Crafts. Specifically miniature model making. I have absolutely loved this. So much so that I went in search of a mini build project to get into during my unplanned extended stay in France.
Reading. This is something I always liked, but for some reason never really embraced during my first marriage. Too many other stresses going on i think. It is now a relaxation go-to. I recently found my (very old) kindle and it actually still works! So that has been a travel based Godsend. I am currently reading my 5th book since I arrived in France.
Art A little bit less of a go-to, but it is still there on the sidelines. I have an art journal with me but honestly. I have not used it all that much yet.
Exercise. Is still there. But it forms a different role. Exercise is a must, but it is not to enable me to continue to be as mobile as I am, and active as I am as I grow older. Being an amputee takes around 4 times more energy just to do the normal daily things. Added to that, I wrestle in and out of compression every day also. I swim, that is still my happy place. I ride (indoors mostly because it is still fairly hard). Walking is limited and I cannot (yet) run. Whether I ever will be able to remains to be seen.
Reality check complete.
It must be so hard to have to except that things will never be the same again…your disability and with out been rude we are all getting on in age…there will come a time when I think maybe your pushing yourself far to hard …and those around you will be suffering and worrying about you …I have to say this but sometimes Common sense comes into force…to help yourself stop while your ahead …your an absolute amazing lady and there are loads of things that could take your mind off pushing yourself to hard…a teacher or lecturer…giving advice to others ..your knowledge on different things you have had to deal with also counselling maybe…
Please take care of yourself ..
Love and Best wishes
Thelma..♥️