Has the comeback already begun?

It’s been an incredibly tough year for me, mentally. This is for a multitude of reasons and I feel like it’s possibly been the toughest one yet since I became an amputee.

Therefore I’m very thankful all these exercise data apps that I use are now churning out wee videos that ‘summarise my year.’ This used to be a novelty, an exception to the rule. Now it seems to be the rule itself.

It’s the perfect example of how you can never see the progress when you are immersed right inside the struggle. Yep, that would be me.

I have always been pretty hard on myself, but the raw data doesn’t lie.

Strava

In this image I want you to take a look at the column on the right. The data that compares this year to last year.

Every inch of this year’s exercise achievements have been fought for. It’s been an uphill struggle all the way. there have been many many days where I have struggled. Even the days where I have pulled out some specific achievement have not come easy. Often I would think everything was shit until I saw the data afterwards. It was always a reliable black and white set of facts to look on afterwards.

That said, you can still kid yourself when speculating on the bigger picture.

I know it’s wrong, but I have always compared myself to my able bodied old self. This comparison disregards the 15 or so years that are between these two versions, or anything age might have to do with it. It’s quite a distorted comparison at best.

Then I tell myself that everything is still shit and that I am making no progress. But the numbers above tell me different.

In these photos the app compares me to its other users. Days active: top 10%. 52 week streak: top 6%.

I can’t be anything but pretty damned proud of that. because I know every day of that 365 days was a fight. A fight in my mind to motivate myself to get out there. A fight physically to manage the pain, a fight to motivate myself to keep getting out there, day after day.

Zwift

This is singly the programme that has helped me the most. And that is certainly not what I expected.

I’m that cyclist who used to think that cycling didn’t count if you weren’t outdoors. Cycling didn’t count if you have an e-bike. Hmmm. Yeah. Have I had to have a massive mental shift! what with all the technology these days that allow you to train inside – and let’s face it, the top athletes embrace this stuff, so why shouldn’t I drag my old school mind into the modern era!

I actually found (and still find) it a lot easier mentally to ride on the indoor trainer. I haven’t physically gone anywhere and if my pain plays up I just get off and go into the house. I don’t have the dramas of having to get home, to be stranded on a bike leg that I can’t walk on.

And Zwift have really stepped up on their features for solo training and riding.

I’m amazed how much a virtual kit motivates me, for example! 😂🥴 and my husband certainly regularly wonders what it is in Zwift that makes me want to thrash myself repeatedly week after week on a bike! #IYKYK 😂

From their short virtual training camps to spotlight workouts and roboriders, I have a lot to thank Zwift for in getting my cycling fitness moving in the right direction.

When I first started trying to use roboriders, I couldn’t even keep up with the slowest one. Now I’m reasonably easily keeping up with Bernie here, looking to move up to the third notch soon, with Miguel, hopefully! Again, measurable gains, which have really helped me see the incremental progress specially on days when I don’t feel like there has been any.

---

Imagine my surprise then, when I got these two summaries from Zwift and Strava on my 2025 year of exercise.

Remember, through all of this, the bike I am using inside is a regular Soecialist Shiv. No assistance, just me and my 1.5 legs.

2 x FTP increases detected by Zwift from my smart trainer, I certainly can’t sniff at that. Although I didn’t have all this data to hand for very long before my amputation (12 months only) I am now starting to equal or better some of my pre amputation splits.

Where to from here?

I honestly don’t know, I have no way of knowing what my leg(s) will allow me to do, now I’m battling a knackered ankle as well as a lymphedema and chronic claudication pain on the left side.

What I can guarantee though, is that I will continue to push the envelope as far as I am able.

Will that allow me back to the start line of Challenge Wanaka for another attempt? I honestly don’t know. My health is so unpredictable that the short to medium term goal setting is what works best right now.

After all, it’s got me this far hasn’t it?

So stay with me on this (considerably longer and slower than I expected) journey of constant surprises.